Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Wonder Woman (2009)

Rate PG-13

Catholic-ometer: 1 of 5




Enjoyability: 1.5 of 5





I admit that I haven't read many Wonder Woman comics (and especially not recent ones,) but I'm familiar with the character and her core supporting cast, and what made the concept work during its initial run.  It's for these reasons that I have to point out just what a miserable failure this movie was, in virtually every respect.  "Wonder Woman" is a load of pushy, overly-violent, trash-talking, modern American feminism, and nothing else.  However, I feel it deserves a more thorough review than just that, so for the rest of the review, I'll be addressing the specific characters and other elements in the movie, to explain just why the film gets them wrong.

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Etta Candy

Etta Candy is a minor character in the film.  So minor, in fact, that she gets, I think, less than a minute of screen-time.  In fact, it makes me wonder why they even bothered to put her in, if they couldn't do a better job on her than this.

In this film, Etta is a tall, blond, skinny, seductive woman, who's briefly scolded by Wonder Woman for asking a man to move a desk for her.

In the comics, Etta Candy was a short, plump, brunette, who was the leader of a college sorority.  Wonder Woman discovered her when she was sickly and weak while visiting a local hospital.  In other words, Etta was unearthed on an errand of mercy; not a manhunt for an enemy, as in this film.

I'm just going to be up-front about this.  Making Etta skinny is something which, by itself, would put this film on my butt-kick list, but the fact that they only used her to demonstrate one of Wonder Woman's character flaws puts it way over the top.

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Hades

In a way, my problem with the film's depiction of Hades is almost the precise reverse of my problem with Etta Candy in one sense, and precisely the same in another sense.

In this film, Hades is a black-haired, lazy, obese man who reclines on a couch and orders people around in the underworld.  I have -never- seen him depicted this way before; not in the comics, and certainly not in any of the ancient Greek artwork that depicted him.  This is the problem which, as I said, is like the opposite of my problem with Etta.

The problem which is the same for both characters is that in neither case do the characters have motives which are even remotely similar to their original counterparts.  Hades was sentenced to rule the underworld by Zeus, to keep him busy, and it apparently worked, as Hades is generally depicted as fearsome, but always a very busy guy.  Yet, in this film, he's apparently not busy, not working, not really fearsome at all, and not the least bit worried about all the extra work he'll have to do when Ares starts killing people.  In fact, he seems to -want- more people to die.

This depiction just made no sense to me.  My conclusion here is that it was just done to avoid having to go too deep into the character, and to prey on the already-miserable fat-person stereotypes, just as a faithful rendering of Etta would have threatened them.

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Steve Trevor

Up to now, we've been dealing mainly with bit players, but I don't think any character does quite as much damage to this movie as Steve Trevor.  In the comics, he was a brave, WWII fighter pilot, who was rescued by Wonder Woman and returned home.  She stayed on as a goodwill ambassador to "man's world," and the two eventually fell in love.  Steve was a little awkward at times, in the comics, but he was a decent man nonetheless.

In the movie, Steve is -not- a decent man.  He's a filthy, womanizing, lecherous, drunken buffoon.  Yes, he can fight pretty well in his own way, but that's just about all he brings to the film, and given that he's playing alongside a superheroine, that means he's basically a worthless character, serving only to give Wonder Woman a reason to visit man's world, and get her into trouble.

But I think I know why they did him this way.  You see, midway through the film, Steve delivers a long and perfectly-accurate speech about how Wonder Woman needs to back off suspecting men of being patronizing every time they do something nice for a woman (she has a nasty habit, in this movie, of taking it as an insult whenever this happens.)  It's a good speech, and coming from, for example, a Sir Galahad or a Superman, it would have been one of the high points of the film, because it would have refuted, once and for all, the prejudices of the Wonder Woman character, and pointed out just what a jerk she was, and had always been, since the film began.

However, the speech loses all of its steam, because, of course, we know that it's coming from a filthy, womanizing, lecherous, drunken buffoon, and in the eyes of modern men, if you're "that kind of person," then any point you make must be a bad one.  This, I think, is why they went to such lengths to keep Steve Trevor from being a decent human being, or a good representative of the male gender, as he was in the comics.  It's because they want that message crushed.

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Ares

The villain of the piece is Ares; the Greek god of war, who's been imprisoned on Wonder Woman's home island of Themyscira for ages, and is seeking a way to restore his powers, so that he can challenge the powers that be.  Ares comes across as being very much like Imhotep from the 1999 version of "the Mummy;" an immensely-powerful and threatening villain, who's seeking forbidden means to make himself even stronger through murder and general evil.

Sadly, of all the characters in this film, he's probably the closest to his depiction in the comics and legends, with one exception.  Even once he "gets his powers back," he still seems to be mortal.  The one constant thing about the legends of the Greek gods was that whether or not they could fight, they were immune to all forms of conventional attack.  This is a -big- flaw in the film.  However, I'll cover this more in a couple sections, when I get to Wonder Woman herself.

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The Amazons

In the past, I've seen two basic depictions of the amazons; Wonder Woman's people.  First, there's the type that remains separate from "man's world" as a sort of religious devotion.  Second, there's the type that genuinely thinks of humans as inferior, and men especially so.  Needless to say, I favor the former over the latter, since an island full of intensely self-righteous and condescending jerks is hardly a proud heritage for a great superheroine.

However, the amazons in this movie take things even further than the worst comic writing I've seen about them.  Not only are they totally convinced of their own superiority, but they practice active prejudice against men, and teach hatred of all men as though it were a religious doctrine.  This is bad enough, but it's not the only problem the amazons have.

You see, it's revealed that this isolation from human beings is not by choice; that the amazons have adopted a life without families or children, with the exception of Diana, who was made from clay, and that they really have only two things in exchange; well-honed warrior disciplines, and the wisdom of ancient books.

I say that these are the only things they have because these amazons are war-hounds and little else.  One of them is shown enjoying books, but even she turns into a battle-thrall near the end of the film, and at no point in the film are the amazons shown to be honest, good-hearted, or moral.  In fact, as far as I can tell, these amazons have no form of moral teaching, though they're perfectly eager to criticize things that offend their emotional sensibilities.  Needless to say, I was singularly unimpressed with the amazons in this movie, and everything about them, and it seems that...

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Wonder Woman Herself

...has learned from them well.  Like them, she's a rabid man-hater and mindless battle-hound, and like them, she's constantly looking down her nose at things she finds emotionally-offensive, while demonstrating no clear, moral understanding at all.

In the original comics, Wonder Woman was a brave, strong woman who fought crime and evil with her special powers, but she was also a caring, gentle soul, more akin to Mother Theresa than Xena; Warrior Princess.  She loved helping people out when they were in danger, or needed assistance, whether it involved fighting someone or not.  It was by no means rare to see her carrying someone to a hospital, or transporting medicine to victims of a plague; all the time with a smile on her face, because she knew she was helping someone.  No other reason was needed.

On top of all that, Wonder Woman was genuinely virtuous; -in the Christian sense- of virtues.  She was humble, honest, charitable, joyful, loved peace, justice and righteousness, and she was as pure-hearted as a newborn.

Sadly, many writers simply don't or didn't understand this about her, and it's become something of a trend in comics to depict her as a sort of "perfect" character who's become imperfect because she -thinks of herself as- perfect, and superior to everyone else.

Still, as bad as this has gotten in the comics, it's even worse in this movie, which paints Wonder Woman as a genuine jerk with nothing even resembling gold in her heart.  Worst of all, this Wonder Woman is capable of murder.

Yes, I realize that she killed someone in the comics as well, under pressure and during what essentially amounted to a hostage situation.  I raise issue with that as well, but not nearly as much as with this film, because at least -that murder- was treated as a genuine, moral problem.  In this film, Wonder Woman has no qualms whatsoever with slicing apart bad guys like cucumbers, -with the intent of ending their lives.-  There is nothing in any way moral or purehearted about this character, and therefore, nothing heroic.

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The Whole World View of the Film

I've said my piece on feminism elsewhere (google "the problem of feminism" in quotes.  It's the first one that pops up,) and I feel no need to repeat it.  However, this movie has, I think, two specific problems with feminism.

1. First, Wonder Woman views the normal attitudes of a normal woman asking for help from a man as -entirely cultural.-  She insists that women can do anything which men can do, and here's the problem with that view.  It's -false.-  It's -false- that women can do whatever men can do.

Women are built differently than men.  Their upper bodies aren't designed for the same kind of strenuous, heavy lifting, their torsos aren't meant for dodging blows in combat, and they wear out faster under prolonged physical activity.  Now, granted, a certain amount of training and practice can limit these disadvantages to a certain degree, but regardless, against a male opponent of comparable skill and practice, a woman would simply find herself outclassed in many areas; usually involving physical activity.

The only reason why anyone would deny this is because Wonder Woman has superpowers, so she -is- built for heavy lifting, swift dodging, etc...  However, Wonder Woman is a fictional character, who is clearly the exception to the rule.  This is why the ancient Greeks found the amazons so humorous to tell stories about.  There was simply no way for women to overpower men in combat en masse in the real world.

This is one of the reasons why the film irks me so.  It attempts to derive its philosophy from the abilities of fictional characters, who only represent a tiny minority, even in their own home universe.

2. There have always been feminist or pseudo-feminist undertones to Woman Woman, but believe it or not, there was a time when feminism was a -good- thing; just the desire to see woman get a just wage for doing the same jobs as men.

By contrast, much of modern feminism (at least in major, feminist organizations) has become just what Wonder Woman herself demonstrates in this movie, a disorganized, disagreeable group of angry, violent individuals, united by radical sexism.

As sad as it's been to see feminism, as a cause, gradually turn into something horrible, it's been even worse seeing Wonder Woman trying to turn into something just as bad.  I guess that's all I really have to say.

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